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As I mentioned yesterday, Saturday was a rough day for me. It seems excessively silly to me to say even that, because nothing actually happened, but I did a whole lot of introspection on the drive to and from the rehab place.

I am not an emotional person. I’m not touchy-feely, hugs make me super uncomfortable, and talking about feelings is pretty much a no-go, ever. I also don’t tend to fall in love with horses. Since I was 18 I’ve pretty much gone from one horse to the next, buying with the intent to sell. I’ve been quite fond of some of my horses, but I’ve never gotten super attached. Even Sadie has been for sale. Henry was purchased specifically for resale. I had a decent offer on him at one point, and I had a number in my head that I would have sold him for that wasn’t far from said offer. Luckily it didn’t pan out.

I’ve always had an “everything is for sale for the right price” mentality, and I kind of always keep a number in my head for every horse… the amount of money it would take for me to sell them. For some of them it was pretty low, for others it was slightly inflated. Henry’s number started out pretty reasonable, and over the past year it’s gotten so inflated that it’s several times what he’s actually worth – far beyond what anyone would ever pay for him. That wasn’t something I did consciously… I didn’t really realize it until now, but the totally unrealistic dollar amount I put on him in my head is definitely a reflection of where my heart is at.

Somehow all of these realizations hit me all at once, and I found myself sitting at the end of the driveway at the rehab place after dropping Henry off, bawling my eyes out. I knew that I’d gotten attached to him, I knew that I was immensely proud of him, and I knew that he was definitely my favorite horse that I’ve ever had, but until all of this happened I didn’t really realize how deep that went.

Until I started throwing my leg over other horses, I didn’t realize just how much I love riding Henry. Until I had to drive away and leave him at the rehab place, I didn’t realize how much I love having that goofy face neighing at me every day. Somewhere along the way, I really fell in love with this horse.

And so I cried pretty much the whole way home, and on and off all afternoon. Why? I don’t really know. It’s pretty ridiculous in the grand scheme of things. 1) It’s a fairly minor injury 2) Henry is close enough, and my schedule is such that I’ll be able to go see him once or twice a week 3) He’s only there for a month. This isn’t a huge deal at all, much worse things can happen. But man… what a reality check this is turning out to be. I am obviously way more attached to him than I thought I was, and I guess I know that now.

Crap. Guess that whole resale thing isn’t really gonna work out, is it…

On Saturday I dropped Henry off at his new home for the next 30 days.

As usual, he loaded up and rode like a champ, although I can tell he’s starting to get a bit full of himself from not being ridden. Everything just happens a lot quicker, with a bit more enthusiasm than necessary.

He unloaded and immediately neighed at all his new QH besties (the rehab place is pretty much full of QH’s at the moment… and a mini…) then marched right in and drank a bucket of water. After a quick lap of his giant stall to check it out (they have doubles!) he touched noses with his neighbor, decided not to kill him, and started to work on his hay.

I was that crazy owner who brought a whole little trunk full of his stuff, and totally hovered for a while before I left. I brought his grooming stuff, a big bag of cookies, a new salt-on-a-rope, his back on track wraps, his sheet, and some of his large assortment of medications. How many other horses have a trunk sitting in front of their stalls? Uh yeah, none of them.

I tried to explain all of his weird little idiosyncrasies while the owners very politely nodded and let me ramble. I told them about 50 times to feel free to send me updates and pictures, and that I’d come visit at least once a week. My crazy flag was flying high.

After I parked my trailer and paid them (bye money), I’d run out of things to piddle around with, so I finally got in my truck and left. It was an emotionally tough day (we’ll talk about that tomorrow) but I think he’s in good hands and will be happy there. They get the horses out several times a day for handgrazing, time on the walker, the aquatred, grooming, etc. He won’t be too bored, and hopefully he’ll be feeling better soon.

28 more days…

If the spirit of me not having a horse to ride for a while…

If you could steal a horse from any of your friends or barnmates, which one would it be?

The obvious choice here for me would be Halo. I mean… he’s a total badass. He’s a lovely mover, a beast on XC, and a good showjumper. He’s big, he’s kind, and he’s gorgeous. I love Herrlerr. Who wouldn’t?

But he’s a big, strong, rangey horse, and I don’t think I’d ride him nearly as well or get the same results that Bobby does. I’m also 100% certain I’d get completely run away with on XC. He’s super fun, but he’s not the type of ride that I’m typically drawn to. Therefore, my answer is Violet. Definitely Violet.

She’s a young TB mare, only 15.1, quirky for sure, and just too adorable for words. Totally my type… I love mares, and obviously I like quirky. It would be easy to pass right by her in the barn, being plain brown and a bit dainty. But under saddle she’s ridiculously impressive – a lovely mover with a wicked good jump.

I’ve ridden her a couple times – there’s not a lot of horse underneath you, size wise, but she has a big stride and lots of power. She sure doesn’t know she’s little.  She’s sensitive but brave and always ready to go go go. What’s not to love about a little fancy sportscar of a horse with tons of talent and plenty of try? She probably has way too much talent for me, but still…

Violet. Definitely Violet.

The good news is, it’s NOT soft tissue. (Can I get a collective hallelujah?)

The bad news is, I was correct – Henry doesn’t feel right. In fact, we found a fracture. A teeny tiny, little bitty baby fracture that most likely happened about a month ago in turnout when he was playing and kicked the fence. Minor, in the realm of fractures, but it’s likely being exacerbated at the moment by how hard the ground is. He also has one hell of a bone bruise. And he is a huge wuss (official, professional diagnosis).

So far the bone looks good (no signs of displacement, fragments, or dying bone) and it’s already trying to heal. There’s not much to do besides give it time and let it continue healing. Luckily complete rest or stall rest are not required. The vet does want it to stay wrapped though, and he’d like for Henry to keep his current conditioning as much as possible. Unfortunately, the ground is just too hard everywhere at the barn to do that, so guess where he’s going for 30 days?

Yup, back to the spa. Guess he liked it so much he wanted a month long rehab stay instead of a spa day trip. 30 days of tons of hand walking, some supervised turnout (sorry kid, no running), wrapping, and aquatred. Then we X-ray again to make sure the bone still looks good and everything is healing appropriately, and if it is, he can start being ridden lightly on soft ground. Total estimated time til a fixed pony: approximately 8 weeks. Worst case scenario the bone starts to die and we have to go in and remove some. Luckily that doesn’t look likely at the moment (my vet is sending the rads to a surgeon at A&M to confirm that opinion) but it’s a small possibility if things go awry. As of right now the bone looks healthy and shows some signs of healing.

This definitely 100% sucks and it definitely means our show season is over. However, I’m so glad that it’s something fairly minor with an excellent prognosis. Once it’s healed, it’s over and done with, and should never be a problem again. I’ll take this over soft tissue or something chronic any day of the week.

So… I guess I’ll have lots of free time on my hands for the next couple months. Lord help us all.

You may have noticed there hasn’t really been any riding content happening here in the last few weeks. Unfortunately, there’s a reason for that.

When Henry came back from boot camp he felt awesome for a few rides, then I galloped him, then gave him a day off, got back on, and he felt… not right. He’d been starting to feel a little “stabby” behind, just like he did last fall, and it had been 10 months since he got his ankle injected. I thought that was it, so I scheduled the appointment, he got his ankle juiced, and I figured it was over and done with.

But it didn’t get any better. In fact, it didn’t really feel any different at all. The problem is that the NQR is so very very slight, really hard to see, and not super consistent. I could feel it though – just the little odd thing here and there that threw up a lot of red flags. A slightly wonky step with the hind end when changing direction, a toe drag on a circle, a really 4-beaty right lead canter. Something is ouchy somewhere.

I gave him more time off, had the vet back out, and all signs pointed to hocks. This made sense, so I opted to just go ahead and do the hocks rather than do the more drastic (and more $$$) full diagnostic work-up. The vet was reasonably optimistic that doing the hocks would fix it, so I hoped we were right.

It doesn’t look like we were right. It’s maybe slightly better, but I still feel something. So… crap. I already scratched our first Training, which was a big womp-womp moment. The vet is coming again today, and we’ll start at the bottom and work our way up, trying to find the source. Hopefully we can. I’m trying not to get myself all worked up about it being a Major Thing Wrong, because it is so very slight, but I’ve had a knot of anxiety in my stomach for a couple weeks now. I’m terrible at dealing with not knowing what’s wrong. And when there are problems in my horse life, I’m one depressed walking lump of doom and gloom.

I just want my horse to feel like himself again. He’s wild and bored, and I’m not doing much better. Just when you think you’re finally making some real progress. Ugh.

This.

Freaking.

Sucks.

But… if there’s anything you’ve been wanting me to write about or review, now is the time to put in a request. There might not be much riding-related content in the near future.