The making of Mini-Henny

Normal people equate autumn with things like pumpkin spice lattes, changing leaves, making soup, and arguing on the internet about whether or not candy corn is disgusting (it’s literally a chunk of sugar so it’s delicious by default, but if y’all don’t want to eat it that’s fine, more for me). To equestrians autumn mostly means fresh horses, lots of shows, and… body clipping.

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me too bro, me too

Back in the days when I was more desperate for money (or, really, before I branched out into other side gigs, because as a horse owner I’ll probably always be desperate for money) I used to do a lot of body clipping. It can be pretty lucrative if you’re willing to do it and can do a decent job, although year after year my willingness has definitely lessened. I’m relatively certain that I will have horse hair in my eyeballs forever after a few particularly busy winters in my heyday. Nowadays pretty much the only way I’ll body clip is if it’s my own horse or a friend’s horse.

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It’s not so much clipping as it is just removing the hair from the horse and transferring it to the human

Henry, bless his extremely hairy and also heat-intolerant heart, feels the same way about clipping as I do. He permits it because he has to and he enjoys the results, but he really isn’t much of a fan. He stands politely for the most part, but he’s so flinchy and sensitive that I get whipped in the face with his tail pretty much the whole time I’m doing his belly.

Lots of opinions. Very weaponized tail.

I’ve bodyclipped Henry so many times over the years that we’ve come to a few agreements by now:

  1. Legs and ears are off limits. He really can’t stand the clippers on his legs at all, he tries to be still but just CAN’T, so he ends up constantly shuffling his feet the entire time. I think I clipped his legs twice ever before I was like SCREW THIS SHIT and agreed that he can just always keep his leg warmers. Thank god we’re eventers and a hunter clip is a normal thing in that world. He genuinely is very uncomfortable/borderline terrified about clipping his ears, even with sedation, so I just get as close to them as possible and he keeps a little fur bonnet. I could push the issue if I wanted (there is a major double standard in this household, because Presto isn’t allowed to have opinions like this), but honestly he does a lot for me and if his hard limit is “no ear clipping” then I’m ok with that. Looks dumb as hell but he wears an actual ear bonnet at shows so who cares. I like my horse more than I like other people’s opinions.
  2. We keep a pretty big saddle patch. Because he’s the most sensitive, easily-rubbed horse ever. The patch is the same size front-to-back as the pad. If I don’t do that, he is uncomfortable and will get rubs. Period.
  3. I use my “little” clippers as much as possible, especially on his belly.
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tools of the trade

I have a set of Lister Star clippers, which are more powerful and faster, but they also have more vibration and are louder, and Henry doesn’t really like them on his midsection. And when I say he doesn’t really like them I mean he acts like he’s being murdered one inch at a time. So unless I’m in a hurry for some reason, I just clip him with my smaller Andis clippers. They’re still pretty powerful but he takes less objection to them on his sensitive areas (let’s be real, he’s a walking sensitive area).

“well that’s rude”

Normally he gets his first clip around the beginning of October, but I waited a little later this year since we aren’t showing and he’s really just coming back into a regular, more rigorous schedule. I was hoping if I waited a little later I wouldn’t have to clip him so many times. I think that was a mistake though, he was hot even in the 70’s weather we had this weekend. His coat is so thick, and he already has problems with heat regulation. I won’t do that again.

But yesterday we got down to it… I bathed him (wow he was FILTHY, he lives in a much sandier place now and I think he’s taking full advantage), got all my stuff ready, and went to town. Usually I use T-84 blades but this time I opted to go a bit shorter with T-10’s (thanks for that 30% coupon, Dover, well timed), hoping it’ll maybe last a bit longer before we have to endure do this again. I found a gross mega-flaky skin patch under all the hair on one side of his butt, too, which again made me feel like a bad horse mom. So he got a fungus bath when we finished and then I turned him back out. He didn’t even pause for a cookie, he just stalked away angrily to the back of the pasture. Two baths and a body clip in one day… I guess he hates me now.

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I cleaned up and packed my things away, pausing to make a little mini-Henny in the process (look, I’m a child and it’s the only real fun I get to have in all this, okay?) and he still refused to even look at me. YOU’RE WELCOME, HORSE. I know he has to feel a lot better, and it’s supposed to be almost 90 tomorrow so he’d have been legit dying otherwise. But, ya know… I’ll just plow him with cookies until he’s over it, like always.

Anybody else body clipping already? Nothing quite like a bra full of tiny stabby horse hairs to officially ring in the fall season.

October 10 Questions

1. What discipline do you ride? What would you ride if you could pick any other one?

I’m an eventer, transplanted from h/j roots. I’m quite happy with my current sport, but I guess if you forced me to switch I’d go back to jumpers (grudgingly) until I got tired of it again. Someday I’d like to try the western equivalent of eventing – Reined Cow Horse. It’s cutting and reining and working cow horse combined. I don’t think I’d fit in with the western crowd but it’s a neat sport.

On a buckskin, naturally

2. How many horses have you ridden in your entire riding career?

Lord, hundreds. I don’t even have the faintest clue at an exact number.

3. Most bizarre activity you’ve done with your/a horse?

I do lots of weird things all the time. Standing on them, swimming, herding goats, riding backwards, jumping anything that will be still long enough…

4. Do you consider riding to be your outlet? If yes, why?

Definitely. As soon as I put a foot in the stirrup, the outside world just melts away. It’s just me and the horse, in the moment 100%. That’s a rare thing in this day and age.

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The only thing that can make me truly live in the moment

5. Have you ever read horse-related magazines? If yes, which one(s)?

A lot when I was a kid, pretty much anything I could get my hands on. These days the only physical magazine I really read is US Eventing, since it comes with my membership and has stuff in it that I’m interested in. I get the USEF magazine too with my membership but almost never read it.

6. Most memorable advice given to you?

This goes back to my teenage years, but I still vividly remember it. I was having a problem where I would make one mistake, say a chip at an early fence on course, and then just completely fall to pieces, with things snowballing to complete shit. My trainer said (and I paraphrase here because this was like 20 years ago) “Look, when you’ve made a mistake, you’ve made a mistake. It’s in the past. You can’t change it. But what you can do is leave it in the past, sit up, kick on, go forward, and make the rest of it better. Everyone makes mistakes, it’s what you do afterward that matters. Don’t let one mistake be your undoing.”. Not only is it true in riding, it’s also profound life advice.

7. Did you ever collect Breyer horse models or similar?

They were expensive so my mom usually bought me the cheaper, smaller Grand Champions, but I did have two Breyer horses that I loved dearly. One was Double Take, the morgan (my favorite breed as a kid), and the other was Secretariat (always been a TB and racehorse fan). They were both early 90’s versions.

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8. Favorite “celebrity” horse?

I’m assuming celebrity means not sporthorse but famous for some other reason? I can’t really think of any except Patrick the Mini horse, so let’s go with him.

9. If you could spend a day learning from any horse person (past or present), who would you choose?

No hesitation, Ingrid Klimke.

10. If you could ride in any international arena in the world, where would you choose?

Hmmm. I’m not really one of those people that gets excited about “hallowed ground” or big atmosphere so there aren’t any arenas that immediately stand out to me as being super exciting. I guess I’ll say Hickstead, because of the Hickstead Derby. That arena is pretty iconic.

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Do you like how I slipped in the most XC-like arena possible?

Happy Friday, y’all! It’s been a long effing week.

SaddleBox: a review

Despite my best efforts when it comes to spending money and acquiring stuff, I’ve had a hard time getting into the subscription box trend. Mostly because, although it’s true that I do love stuff, I’m also really picky and perpetually on a budget, so I tend to be pretty particular about how I spend my money and what exactly I buy. The surprise factor of the subscription boxes has always made me a bit leery. When SaddleBox contacted me about a review I had to think on it for a bit, and responded warning them that I was only willing to do it if they didn’t mind me being brutally honest. They seemed confident, so they sent me a box.

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Before I get into the nitty gritty, there were a few things that appealed to me about SaddleBox upon initial inspection of their website. I really like that the company supports horse rescues – that always helps soften the blow when you’re spending money. It also always includes treats, which… Henry literally has 6 different kinds of treats right now because he is the most rotten horse on the planet. We are always down for trying new treats or just accumulating more (fun fact, they have a page full of treat recipes on their website if you’re into making your own!).

The box was relatively packed with stuff, that’s for sure. It’s always satisfying to get a heavy box with lots of stuff to dig through. In that way I can kinda see the appeal of monthly box subscriptions. It’s like Christmas. As for the actual contents of the box, some I like, some is not for me, but there are TEN items in here. The more the merrier.

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Besides treats, SaddleBox always includes some kind of grooming supplies, whether its shampoo or brushes or general barn stuff. This I really do like, because it feels like you’re getting essentials, which are always useful and makes the whole idea of a subscription box feel less frivolous. This box included:

  • Buckeye peppermint treats ($10)
  • CoFlex wrap ($2)
  • Fiebing’s saddle soap ($5)
  • tack sponge ($1)
  • Epona hoof pick ($9)
  • a face brush (I dunno, lets just say $3)
  • Tough-1 Great Grips shedding blade ($10)
  • Epona grooming mitt ($9)
  • a book “Handy Hints for the Horse Person” ($6)
  • a big, amusing sticker ($3)
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Grem also wants me to list the box as an included item, because that was her favorite part

For me personally the contents of the box were kind of middle of the road. I always like treats, although these particular ones are not Henry’s favorite… he’ll still eat them eventually, if a bit unenthusiastically. Would I have bought them? Those particular ones, probably not. Buckeye is a good brand though. The CoFlex wrap is great because there’s no such thing as too much of that stuff, let’s be real. Would I have bought that? Yes, at some point. Same goes for the tack sponge – a simple staple that I always need. The saddle soap would go in the win column for me too, because I did actually need more. The grooming mitt probably isn’t something I would have bought, but I love those types of mitts for baths, so we’ll count that as a win too. Hoof picks are another essential, although I am obsessively married to the Ultimate Hoof Pick, this Epona one is suitable enough to keep (I put it in my trailer as an emergency spare). The book was fine, I leafed through it quickly and saw a couple of semi-useful tidbits but it’s also not something I would have bought. The sticker I did find kind of amusing, so it now resides in my office at work.

It fits right in

The only things I definitely didn’t like were the little face brush (I legit have like 10 of them and never use a single one. I’d also just gotten an almost identical one the day before in my FEH packet so it was kind of amusing. They multiply at an alarming rate.) and the shedding blade (I hate these types of shedding blades. Haaate.). Both of those will go in the donate bin.

As far as bang for your buck, the overall value of the box is at least $55, and the cost from SaddleBox is $35 per month (or $30 for the first month’s box with the LOVEHORSES coupon code). You can cancel anytime, which is nice, so you don’t feel like you’re signing up for some kind of major financial obligation. They also have gift plans if you want to do a box or a subscription as a gift, although they’re a bit more expensive.

Overall – is there value there? Yes, for sure. Is it something I would buy for myself? Probably not. It didn’t really excite me enough to make me want to part with my money on a monthly basis. I could definitely see myself giving it as a gift though. I think the target audience for something like this is a more casual horse person or a hobby rider. A new rider would probably love it too, or a lesson kid. It’s a company I would feel good about giving my money to, so I’ll be keeping it in mind next time I need a fun, unique gift for a horse person. If you want to keep up with Saddlebox, follow them on Insta here or facebook here.

I Just Like to Look

It’s one of my favorite times of year – sale season! Thank the lawd that I am alive in an age where we can look at an endless amount of ponies online at just the click of a button. Two big eventer-centric sales happen one right after the other in Ireland in November – Monart and Goresbridge. It’s my ultimate dream that someday we will have a fantastic eventer sporthorse auction like these in the US someday. I spend a lot of time thinking about how we could make it work, and get our american bred sporthorses in the hands of american riders. It’s a lot harder here.

just a full brother to Annie Clover, nbd…

I also really like the foal auctions from the breeding registries, with Zangersheide usually being my favorite. The Holsteiner folks have a few auctions a year and the summer one, with young horses, is always a highlight to me too. You do start to lose me a bit with the riding horse auctions where the horses have clearly been pushed and the gaits or jump are definitely being manufactured and manipulated. Those are… not so great. But still, these sales are the best kind of window shopping, you can see so many horses right there in one spot, with their breeding listed. I’m definitely NOT a buyer, but as someone who is perhaps a bit obsessed with breeding I like to look at as many horses as I can. These things are a free education. Seeing the horses online isn’t as good as seeing them in person like we sometimes go gallivanting across Europe to do, but there’s still a lot to be gleaned.

Plus lets be honest it’s fun to pick out the ones you like most and then see how they sell and who buys them, even if a small part of me dies every time an American rider buys from overseas. A lot of big name riders source young horses from these sales, and I get why. There are so many nice ones in one place, in a way we certainly haven’t been able to emulate here yet.

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Copper Beech, sourced from Goresbridge

Aside from trying to pick out the best ones, I also like to pretend-shop for myself. The horse I’d pick for me is different from the one a lot of pros would gravitate towards as a 5* horse. I want something nice but not so fancy that I can’t ride it, something with enough TB blood, that doesn’t seem like too much a of punk, and from a line that I’m pretty familiar with. This go-round I’m picking this one:

Yes, it’s buckskin. We’ve talked before about my weird closeted obsession with buckskin, ok? Don’t act surprised. I will never get on board with breeding for color but if a horse I already like comes in buckskin wrapping, it’s on. This one is by a stallion I’ve mentioned on here a few times (because I’m low key obsessed but he’s not available frozen so it’s one big SAD for me), who is the sire of one of my favorite 5* horses Tullabeg Flamenco, and it’s out of the same dam as freaking BANGO. This guy, Wheelagower Gold, looks like a total dude in his video. Like he could pack my butt around with few complaints. The only thing that could make him better is if he was a she.

Aside from the sporthorse auctions I also have a relatively unhealthy addiction to perusing TB listings. Let’s be honest, if I ever actually DID have a budget for another horse (which I don’t need in any way shape or form) it would certainly be trending more towards OTTB. Totally fine by me, since I love them. I keep up with TB bloodlines with the same level of obsession, and my endless window shopping is definitely a part of that. Benchmark Sporthorses will be the death of me someday, and I regularly like to browse the CANTER listings. Which is where I stumbled upon this guy:

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Potomac River, a 10 year old stakes-winning stallion. I’m always on the lookout for good TB stallions for sport programs that we could breed to the warmblood mares, and this one definitely stopped me in my tracks. He’s raced for SEVEN YEARS, still has clean legs, and has a pedigree stacked with turf lines. Be still my heart. Surely some sporthorse person needs him.

What horses have y’all been pining after online lately? Show me ponies! Or… who’s your favorite in the Goresbridge sale? Or… who’s buying me Potomac River? Kidding (no I’m not).

RRP (and the Little Orphan Annex award winner!)

Most of you fellow OTTB enthusiasts know that the Retired Racehorse Project Makeover show was last week. A few bloggers were there with their horses, and it was fun to follow along and watch the videos and live stream. The Makeover is totally a bucket list item to me, and looks super fun. I reaaaaally want to try my hand at it someday, if ever there is room in my life for another OTTB. It’s pretty amazing to see one big week-long showcase of all the different things they can do, and with less than a year of retraining at that.

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It seems like there’s always some kind of drama following this show (maybe something to be expected when you get so many different disciplines and green horses together?) and unfortunately this year was no different. My goodness, the drama around the barrel racing. Wow. Did anyone else see that unfold on social media?

For those who aren’t familiar, the Makeover is a show, but really it’s a training competition. It’s all judged and scored, and even the more simple timed events (like showjumpers and barrel racing) have flatwork tests where the quality of the training that has gone into the horse is judged. For barrel racing, its a relatively simple horsemanship test, the results of which are rolled together with timed runs to come up with a final score. No event at the Makeover is immune from a judged portion, because, remember, this is really a training competition. They’re trying to encourage people to prioritize a solid foundation over rushed training that leaves a lot of holes.

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So anyway, the girl who ended up with the two fastest times on the actual barrel runs had a lower horsemanship score, which brought them down a few spots in the rankings. A lot of barrel racers WERE NOT HAPPY about that. They argued that barrels was a timed event, plain and simple, and the fastest horse should be the winner. Period. They shouted that it was rigged, and that horsemanship and judged flatwork had no place in barrel racing.

Which… wow… there’s a comment to stop you in your tracks. I think if ever you find yourself arguing that horsemanship and a solid foundation have no place in your sport, whatever that sport may be, you might want to re-evaluate what you’re doing here. Effing yikes.

A lot of people seemed to have a hard time understanding that nothing about the Makeover judging is typical of standard showing. The cross country is scored, the showjumpers do flatwork and gymnastics and optimum time rounds, etc etc. Because, again, it’s a training competition, not a regular show. It’s pretty abundantly clear in the rules, which outline all of this and are available online to anyone. Even I knew the format and I’ve never done the Makeover. Reading remains a difficult task for some, I suppose.

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But anyway, Fallon Taylor won the barrel racing, which seemed to just add fuel to the “IT’S RIGGED” fire, and then Fallon also won the grand 10k prize for Most Wanted Thoroughbred, and lord I thought some folks’ heads were gonna explode. Which, to be fair, I was kinda sad about her winning the overall too (I voted for Rosie!) but it’s good publicity for the OTTB in western events, so whatever. Either way… woooow the drama. It’s a damn shame, IMO, because the Makeover is just so freaking cool. If you can watch those freestyles without a tear coming to your eye, you’re not human. The Makeover isn’t perfect, they’ve got kinks to work out for sure, but still… it’s insanely cool. OTTB’s are awesome.

One of the big highlights of the Makeover was of course the winner of the Little Orphan Annex Memorial award, funded by fellow bloggers in honor of Hillary’s mare Annie. This award went to the highest placed chestnut mare, which ended up being a super badass little creature named Great Reward – winner of the polo division!

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Is she sweet?
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Is she salty?
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Maybe both

Hillary and I were both thrilled to see her win it, she was really fun to watch and definitely embodied that spicy chestnut mare spirit that Annie had. Thanks to everyone who contributed and helped make this happen, it was a truly special way to remember such an awesome mare.